Handcuffs
by death by storm
Summary: When L died, Raito got the handcuffs. Watch as, years later, he visits L's grave for the first time. Warnings: A slightly OOC Raito, character death. NOT an "I am slitting my wrists because I am depressed fic." Just thought I'd make that clear XD.


_Hey all, long time no see eh? Normally I would have written a one shot in honour of L's b-day, but this was kicking around on my computer and I decided that it would be fun to upload. ... I don't know whether to call this story dramatic or amusing, but it's something anyway._

**Disclaimer:** I only own my computer, my textbooks and the visage of an exhausted Environmental Science Major.

Handcuffs

When L died, Raito got the handcuffs. Or, at least, he had slipped into the room they both had shared one night and taken them. At the time, it was rather puzzling to him why he wanted them. After all, they only reminded him of his imprisonment. He kept them hidden for years. Not even Misa knew that he had them. He had always thought that if she found them - which she wouldn't. Raito had hidden them too well - he would be able to explain it to her as some kind of trophy. Proof that he had killed the great L. Something to look back on when times were hard. If the investigation team ever found it... well he hoped that they would never suspect him enough to search his home. Not that they would find it if they did. They were rather incompetent and had proved that to Raito more than once.

And, indeed, that is what he did in those times of trial and suffering. Both before and after the Yellow Box warehouse incident he had spent hours gazing at the silver chinks of metal. Misa had died only thirteen months after the demise of Near. Almost all of the free world was on its knees at his feet. He planned to show his face to his adoring public sometime in the next six months. That charismatic mask fixed in place as always.

Raito's life had become rather boring over the last few years. Of course, he did have friends. Well, his friends were really for show. He likened them more to acquaintances than true friends. None of them were on the same level of intelligence that he was. L had been and he was the only one that he had met that was. Near was intelligent, but not on the same level as L. He had assumed too many things and as a result, both he and the investigation team had died in that warehouse.

He found himself taking out the handcuffs more and more often and thinking about L. Still, this didn't bother him. He was about to ascend to the throne as Kira, the ruler of the world and God of Justice.

It was when he began to get cravings for sweets that he began to worry. He had always liked his foods more savoury and his coffee a bitter black. If he wasn't the God of the New World, he would be sure that it would be wise to see a psychiatrist. Of course, he didn't plan on seeing one anytime soon. They wouldn't be able to tell him anything that he didn't already know about himself.

The question was, why did he miss L so much? The easy answer was that he was bored. Even L's heirs, as fierce as they had been, hadn't been able to compete against him for as long as L had. And in the end, he _still_ didn't know the man's name. It had been a secret he had taken to the grave because Rem's notebook had been wiped blank when she died. When he had originally found that out, he had been enraged. It made him feel like L had been the true victor, in his own way.

Raito was also starting to feel the grind. Part of him really wondered why people still committed crimes. There was an easy, and rather depressing answer to that. Some were too arrogant to even consider that he would find their name and face and kill them. Then there were the underground crime rings. That would be easy enough to rectify, but he was planning to wipe out the last of the underground crime rings as a way of introducing himself.

His dreams also began to be filled with visions of the detective. For the first time Raito actually wished there was an afterlife. At least he and the detective could see each other in hell... then he remembered. Even if there was an afterlife, he was doomed to an afterlife of nothingness, thanks to his use of the Death Note.

Raito stopped smiling. He began to lose joy in the simple things. There was no satisfaction left in killing criminals, manipulating people. Even hearing people chant his names at the rallies done in support of him and finding out about the cults that had cropped up in his honour did not tickle his fancy . He called in his first sick day and ignored the whispers generated by the fact that he had taken the first day off in his life. He didn't count the mandatory vacation days. They were necessary to keep his mind working.

After his second day of playing hooky, he came to the conclusion that he was depressed. He took the day off again, begging that it was the anniversary of a friend's death and he felt the need to visit his grave.

The graveyard was deathly silent when he arrived. He parked his car in some non-descript place and stepped out. It was relatively close to the ocean, so he could smell the sea salt in the air. It had been so long since he had come here, he was not consciously aware of where L's grave was. His feet knew the way, though, and they took him there automatically.

It didn't look like anyone had visited the grave in awhile. Raito wasn't surprised. Everyone else who had known L was dead. He was L now. He knelt by the stone and ignored the dampness that soon soaked through his normally immaculate trousers. After it was cleared of excess plant growth, he sat down and leaned against the stone.

"L," he said. "I suppose that if you were alive, you would be wondering why I am here. Especially when I am Kira. I... just need some intelligent conversation."

Despite that, he fell silent, and just stared at the sky. He stayed there until the sun began to set, and he was shivering from the cold.

"Sayonara, L," he said. With one last look at the grave, he left.

It was strange, really, but Raito began to find himself on the road to the graveyard every Saturday. He would sometimes bring things from work, or even the Death Note with him. Raito would laugh and talk for hours, addressing a person, whom he admitted was quite dead. It was strange, but he felt closer to the dead detective than to the people that he interacted with daily. Or, perhaps it wasn't so strange. Well, Ryuk certainly found it amusing. In fact, the Shinigami began to come with him every time he went to visit L.

At times, the Shinigami would look at the numbers above Raito's head and cackle in that annoying way of his. Raito learned to ignore it. Finally the day came. Or, to be exact, the day before the day. As usual, Raito leaned against the stone, coughing a little between sentences from the bout of pneumonia that he had acquired.

"Tomorrow is the day, Ryuzaki. L" Raito said with a serene smile decorating his face. "Tomorrow I reveal my identity as Kira to the world and take my rightful place as God of the New World."

Raito succumbed to another bout of coughing, wet and scraping. When the fit subsided, he continued.

"I really wish you could be here to see this," he said. "My only real friend in life, to witness my ultimate triumph. It's unfortunate, but I am well aware that you wouldn't have appreciated this one bit."

Raito began to cough again and this time it was a good two or three minutes before the fit finished. He wrinkled his nose at the disgusting metallic taste that it brought to his mouth. As was becoming a norm for him, he sternly reminded himself that while he was a God, he was in a mortal body, and as such susceptible to mortal ailments. He would have to go to a clinic and get a prescription.

Ryuk fell over cackling at the sight.

"Quiet, Ryuk," Raito gasped. His chest heaved as he fought to catch his breath. "I'm trying to say goodbye to L. This is the last time I will be able to visit his grave. I don't want it to be sullied by the hands of the masses after I announce myself tomorrow."

Ryuk just laughed harder.

"Ryuk!" Raito doubled over coughing once again. Blood dribbled from his lips and speckled the palm of the hand he had used to cover his mouth. His chest bucked as he tried to catch his breath to no avail. Raito was never more thankful than he was right then when he was suddenly able to breath again. This was it. He was in trouble and needed to get medical assistance immediately. Too bad his phone was in the car.

Raito pulled himself to his feet and almost blacked out. His limbs were weak from lack of air and his mind felt blank and numb. Ryuk had stopped laughing and was now watching with acute interest. Raito took a breath and fell to the ground again as he began to cough once more. Again, Raito waited until the coughing subsided before he pulled himself to his feet once more. He was dimly aware of how much more effort it was to haul himself up the second time.

Raito gasped and began to cough again. This time, he couldn't stop. Black spots began to speckle his vision as he struggled to gasp in the air that just wouldn't come. He collapsed, his head hitting L's gravestone with a dull thud. Raito landed on the cold earth, but he was beyond feeling by then. His body twitched a couple of times, before it fell still.

Ryuk cackled once more. He picked up the Death Note that lay beside Raito.

"Sayonara, Raito," he said.

Ryuk's wings burst from his back, and he flew off. He was sure the memory of what had happened would amuse him for quite some time.

* * *

_It suddenly occurs to me that this is the second one-shot fic that I have written featuring Raito winning against Mello and Near O.O_

_If you review, it would really make my day XD._


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